Looking at the Body, Not Just the Behaviour

Welcome, and thank you for being here.

This week, I want to share a perspective that quietly shaped the way I cared for Alister over the years, the decision to look beyond behaviour, and to pay closer attention to the body.

What I Began to Notice

When Alister was younger, many conversations centered around behavior, attention, meltdowns, restlessness, withdrawal. Alister was also speech‑impaired and did not begin speaking until he was about eight years old. In those early years, words were not available to him as a way to explain discomfort, confusion, or need.

Living closely with him every day, I began to notice patterns that did not feel purely emotional or psychological.

There were days when he was calmer, more focused, more present, and days when everything felt harder for him. These changes were not random. Over time, I realised they often coincided with sleep, food, digestion, routine, and overall physical comfort.

When language is limited, behaviour becomes the voice.

Behaviour, I learned, is often communication.

Shifting My Focus to the Body

This realisation led me to gently explore areas that are sometimes overlooked, nutrition, sensitivities, routines, and environmental factors. At that time, Alister was extremely selective with food. For years, he ate little beyond noodle soup. His choices were limited, repetitive, and deeply tied to comfort and predictability.

Rather than forcing change, I worked around what was possible. Nutrition became a gradual, careful process, supported by supplements. These were introduced slowly, thoughtfully, and always with close observation.

To this day, Alister continues with his supplements. What has changed is ownership. As an adult, he is now fully aware of what he takes and why. He monitors his own intake, tells me when something is finished, and lets me know when it needs to be replenished.

This sense of awareness and responsibility did not appear overnight. It grew quietly over time.

Nothing was rushed. Nothing was forced.

What Changed Over Time

The changes were not dramatic or immediate. They appeared quietly.

Better sleep came first. Then longer moments of calm. Over time, focus improved, and emotional regulation became more stable. These were small shifts, but they mattered, because they created space.

Space for learning. Space for creativity. Space for confidence.

When the body felt more regulated, Alister was better able to express who he already was.

Why This Matters

I share this not as advice, but as lived experience.

Every child is different. What works for one may not work for another. But I believe it is important for parents to feel empowered to observe, to question gently, and to trust what they see over time.

Looking at the body does not replace understanding the mind or the heart, it supports them.

A Thought for Other Parents

If you are in a place where behaviour feels overwhelming, I invite you to pause and look deeper. Sometimes the body is asking for care before the mind can settle.

Progress does not need to be fast to be real. Small, consistent steps, taken with patience, can open doors you did not know were there.

Next week, I will share more about how routine and structure played a role in our journey, and why consistency became one of our greatest supports.

With warmth and quiet confidence,

A Proud Mom